Friday, October 4, 2013

Washington Cocktail

As we are all aware by now, the U.S. Federal Government in Washington, D.C. has been shut down since last Thursday. 

 But where is the panic?
The chaos?
Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies?
Rivers and seas boiling?
Forty years of darkness?
Earthquakes, volcanoes?
The dead rising from the grave?
Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria?

 Well, if you ask me, that's because the overwhelming majority of Americans don't really need the 535 jerks in Congress, 9 jerks on the Supreme Court, 2 jerks in the White House, and the untold army of  bureaucratic jerks in Washington D.C. telling them what to do and how to live to be able to make it through the day.  We can wake up, eat breakfast, go to work, come home, have dinner, brush our teeth and go to bed without ever giving a passing thought to any of the politically-charged crap those idiots think is so important.
Jerks.

 Black-Robed Jerks.

The dirty secret to this whole "shutdown" thing is that it's not really a shutdown.  Any part of the U.S. Government considered "essential" is still fully functional.  Which begs the question: "If there are non-essential functions that we can do without while the jerks in Congress are having their petty squabbles, then why the hell are those same jerks spending OUR money on these things in the first place?"

Oh, yeah.  One other thing about the Washington, D.C. "shutdown"...
Congress still gets paid.

Screwing-The-Little-People-While-Collecting-Their-Fat-Paycheck Jerks.

I swear, it's almost enough to drive you to drinking.

WASHINGTON COCKTAIL

 1.5     oz        Dry Vermouth
.75     oz        Cognac
1        dash    Bitters
1        dash    Simple Syrup

Add all ingredients to a mixing glass with ice
Stir
Strain into a chilled cocktail (martini) glass

"Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself."
---Mark Twain

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