Friday, September 27, 2013

J.R.'s Godfather

J.R. Ewing, of the 2-era spanning hit series Dallas, remains the all-time greatest villain in television history.

Unless you count C-SPAN as television...then this b**** wins.

J.R. was played by the great Larry Hagman, who died November 23, 2012.  Every year television's Emmy Awards has a nice eulogy section for TV stars that passed in the previous calendar year.  So on this year's "In Memoriam" segment they of course...didn't mention him at all.

He was J.R. ****ing EWING!!!

The episode "Who Done It?", which revealed the answer to the worldwide question "Who shot J.R.?" was at it's time the highest-watched TV series episode EVER (and currently sits in second place to this day). Again, J.R. Ewing.  I suppose they must have had a very good reason to not include the actor of the tube's most iconic villain, right?

The strung-out punk from Glee?  Instead of J.R.?

It's official, friends.  Network television sucks. 


2     oz        Bourbon
1/2  oz        Amaretto

1) Fill a rocks glass with ice
2) Add liquors
3) Stir

4) Scheme

Friday, September 20, 2013

Bourbon Sling

Most drinkers have heard of the Singapore Sling (which just might be featured on this blog at some point in the future).  But, in keeping with the theme of National Bourbon Heritage Month, today's recipe is another bourbon cocktail.

Bourbon is a wonderful liquor.  Depending on the amount consumed, it can make you [think you are] comical, whimsical, hysterical, adorable, agreeable, beautiful, commendable, valuable, lovable, delightful, genial, sociable, acceptable, graceful, presentable, tasteful, desirable, enjoyable, pleasurable, invincible, and even invisible. 

WARNING:  Excessive use of BOURBON can result in wearing the following SLINGS-


2     oz        Bourbon
1     oz        Lemon Juice
1     tsp       sugar

*     ****       *****

Add all 3 ingredients to a martini shaker 1/2 filled with ice
Shake vigorously
Strain into a chilled cocktail (martini) glass

* Yes, technically this drink calls for 2 tsps of water, but as we learned with another classic bourbon drink:
"I don't water down my drinks.  And neither should you."
---Craig 11/9/12


Friday, September 13, 2013

Churchill's Holiday

I'm not really sure about the origin of this drink's name.  After all, Winston Churchill was a notorious gin martini drinker, not a bourbon connoisseur.  Once asked how much vermouth he would like in his martini he was quoted as saying: "I would like to observe the vermouth from across the room while I drink my martini."

In any event, this is a bourbon cocktail.  Why bourbon?  Because September is National Bourbon Heritage Month.  Now we have yet another reason to love September along with school starting again, NFL season starting, a VIP birthday,  and Labor Day.  So pick any of those for the "Holiday" part of the name, ignore the "Churchill" part, and enjoy this autumn cocktail.


1.5     oz     Bourbon
1/2     oz     Cointreau

1/2     oz     Honey Liqueur
1/2     oz     Apple Cider
 3 pinches cinnamon

Pour ingredients in to a mixing glass with ice
Stir gently
Strain into a chilled cocktail glass

Garnish with an orange wheel

Friday, September 6, 2013

It's Football Time!

OK, so technically football season has already started.
If you like the inferior college game.
Yeah, yeah, boo if you want.  You know I'm right.

I prefer to watch the game as played by enormous men moving at unholy speeds crashing into each other with forces that could split atoms all while making crap-tons of money.
(OK, so Johnny Manziel also does the latter, go college!).

I could debate the college vs. pro game all day, but the true question to be addressed on this blog is "What to drink while watching?"

The simple answer is Beer.

If you are just looking to enjoy a few brews while lightly snacking on popcorn, pretzels, chips, and the like then one of the light beers from the American pilsner trifecta is probably your best bet:

Nachos, tacos & burritos?

Pizza, barbeque, fried fish?

Baked hummus and spinach dip, brie & crackers, cheddar fondue?

You are a chick and you're not watching the game anyway.  Drink whatever the hell you want and shut up if it's not a commercial.